Need to let my emotions flow

How can i really say this? I finished a 447 page book in a total of 10 hours....thats Idk tbh ive got alot on my mind idk who reads these posts i know fan girls and guys read the ones on my music posts but what abt these? Idk ive been doing really good in my life right now. And well idk ok look here it is im really emotional right now idk what im feeling it ranges from joy to flirty to sad to depressed amd scared. I mean ive done so much wrong and as of tonight ya know i thought i had moved past it but theres still things i need to face. And i suppose i should do it head on face to face.....actually i got really nervous tonight and wanted to back out.  But idk i thought of david and samson. david committed so much wrong and yet he didnt run from his consequences. No he faced them. And i didnt it took me awhile to do tht.  But david he knew he couldve died when he went up against goliath (yes im bringing up the oldest tale told way to much) no he had faith in jah so thats what im gonna do. And samson when he told his secret that cost him his strength and he killed all those pagans and fell with them. He was happy to do it for jah and he didnt want to live or want a reward. So basically when this newest obstacle comes up where i have to sit down and talk abt the past and maybe fix things im going to do it head on. Pray to jah for strength.  And ask for patience not for the situation nut myself so i can stay calm and get thru it its going to be hard for me but im going to do it and whether it ends badly which i pray for the opposite ill still be there no matter what like i always said. But this book ive been reading the series always has my emotions running with the book but near the end while i was faceing my past i couldnt fall into the book. I had.so many other emotions going on. Joy pure joy and then heart stoping fear i hatr my past i hatr myself for the things i did.  I chose the wrong things i started relationships tht should have remained at friends and some remained as nothing. But no im an idiot. But its all positive haah i jave to keep tellong myself tht cause it gets me thru mom haveing surgery tomorrow.  Shel'l be fine and if she dies she'll be in the new system. Haha all positive. But my next post will be abt brother schotts talk tonight he gave.  It was titled "clothe yourselfs with love". Twas a wonderful talk.  Anyway im kinda wanna cry haha but ive learned to not hide.my good emotions sadness shouldnt be held in around those u love unless its to be the father or older brother who has to be the father type to the younger brother cause their dad is an erragant bi-polar jerk.  But thats life. And all we can do is go with it it never gets easier we learned to either one adapt or two give up. So id like to rant on something specific here tht has to do with me.dealing with my past.....we all fear rejection those who dont have given up. Now whether it be rejection from u opening up and saying i lile u and her saying no or to u asking for a privilege and not qualifing. We all fear it. But it comes regardless and i fear it but i welcome it if its what is meant to be . And thats it im sorry i needed to get tht out

Watch "Beautiful Creatures - MOVIE FEATURETTE HD (2012) MEGATRAILER TV" on YouTube
This is one of my fav series of books ever and they are coming out with a movie!!!!! I have problems...alot of them with who they got to play who in the movie and how they are portraying some things but it will be great none the less

Ariel Bloomer

ARIEL BLOOMER FROM ICON FOR HIRE awesome band

SHE IS MIINNNEEEE I SHALL MARRRRYY HER

^this is my fav^

Awesome girl led bands

Tongiht alive- Starlight <3

Call atlantis- past regrets, future threats <3

Courage my love- Bridges

Courage my love- Barricade

Icon for hire- Make a move <3

The dirty youth- Fight

The nearly deads- Never look back (zombie music vid)

Fit for rivals- Damage

Fit for rivals- Crash

Weeeeelllll

sooo you know how i said id show u guys my 300 something playlist of screamo and stuff????


wellll i dont think im gonna do that anytime soon hahahaha its sooo long
 buuttt heres some new songs i upload to my phone tonight if it has a "(ns)" it means not screamo

A stained glass romance- tom cruise control
Bless the fall- Rise up....rise up acoustic...promised ones
Scarlett O'hara- Lost in existence
The crimson armada- Forgive me
Confide- Such great heights
Shoot the girl first- Last breathe for a capulet
Forgive my silence- This is only the beginning
Raise the sails- John riis became one of them
Stick to your guns- Amber
Victory sweet victory- Sun and the stars (ns)
To the lions- Breathless
Periphery- Letter experiment (instrumental).....Make total destroy...Icarus lives
Sirens & Sailors- You and die...I've got a masters degree in common sense
Erra- White noise....Pattern Interrupt
Like moths to flames- Leanr your place
In fear and faith- Heavy lies the crown...Live love die....The taste of regret
Miss may i- Day by day
Palisades- Disclosure
Phoenix- Lasso (ns)

AAAMMMMMAAZZZZIINNGGGG 7-8 string bands!!!!

this is Vildhjarta-traces

personally i dislike them cause they are just idk not my style they are extremly heavy but really talented

this is After the burial- Berserker 

i got to see them live and they are ammmaazzinnggg i give them a 10 but yeah heavy vocals here after the 40 seconds

Erra- Pattern interrupt

idk if this is 8 string but they are really good

they play 7 string

and this is one of my fav songs ever as of now

VOLUMES- SERENITY

well i havent posted in a while cause apparently i have asthmatic bronchitis. its the worst thing i have ever felt and it keeps going. it started about two weeks ago i went to the docs and tht bimbo said it was just a headache. geeerrrrrr so anyway a week later my mom forced me to the e.r. and they said i had the asmy broncy and so far its still not any better....anywho i plan on my next post to be about all the songs i have on my playlist for my phone one is nothing but screamoish and has 340 songs on it now.

so today is the day of the concert i havent been excited at all till today abt it.matter a fact ive actually been threatening to not even go. but memories are all i have and want in life. but omg ill get to see austin carlile like i will cry if i get to talk to him  no joke im already on the verge of tears trying to think abt it ughhhhhhh
heres some vids of who ill get to see

The color morale- Hummanaquin rate:8

The overseer-  amend rate: 5

Of mice & men- Second & Sebring rate:9

August burns red- Marianas trench rate: 8.5

So i took some of my old band tees and stuff and decided to cut them into awesome tank tops. Yes ibwear these in public i have more but they are just my old football work out shirts

YOU WASCAWY!!! WABBITT!!~!!!



sorry i felt like tht needed to be said but any whoo concert is tomrrow and tbh im a bit nervous dont know why maybe cause i dont wanna be late. i also am getting my hair cut wednesday and it shal be epic!!!!1 and my contacts should come in soon
i wonder if ill get asked if im part of one of the bands like i did last time haha

new song and stoof

so its been 6 days and ive gotten 100 veiws on my blogger thank you guys so much! its not much for alot of people but it is for me ok so first off have you tried bacon flavored sunflower seeds???????? amazing!!!!! i love em tho i found them in a gas station 30 min.s away so ill have to look around town for them. so my hair if i have a beanie on it goes to the middle of my eyes. i love it im going to try and straighten it. btw the reason i said if i have a beanie is because my hair puffs out and it has a big curl inwards once it gets long so it shortens thus why imma try and straighten it tomorrow.but besides tht nothings really neeewwww there is one thing but idk if it will happen and i dont wanna get my hopes up but besides tht im gonna start running alot like every sunday and monday if i can!!!!! but tomorrow is monday and im afraid we shall not be running, hahaha i called my buddy who lives like 3 minutes away today and he cant sing, or scream, or even play guitar but he is in band and knows all the musicy stuff tht i have no clue abt so basically i got an idea to make a song named

Not all faery tales have a happy ending

When hope is all but lost

And everything falls apart

Alight from the darkness will rise anew

tis where a feary tale shall start

(yes i spelled fairy "wrong"...in my opinion thts the way you do spell it cause they are part of the fae world) thats all i have for right now but basically i want to start off with me saying that in a whisper and i either want a slow picking pattern clean to start off from the beginning and then stop as i say the last line then the heavy stuff comes in or i pick before the last line then the heavy starts after a little silence. the reason why im having him help me is because i need help putting together all the little things i have created on guitar and he can help me put it different ways ya know? plus he can compose music and play i think piano so it will help basically hes the brain im the raw talent 

Yep Soooo i didnt go to the total w
ar concert cause well i know more than half the band personally and before they were in the band. Meh but apparently the principles at tje highschool are out tp bust me. Idk what for cause i dont do anything.ugh as soon as i do good. Satan be all like u shall be punished! Hahaha silly satan u no get me. Hehe. Besides tht i drank 120 ounces of monster.......yeah its 348 im reaping the consequences.  Major head ache and wanting to throw up but cant. Anyway will i drink it again? Yes but not tht much! Anywho im not gonna name names but u know who u are. Look i have tumblr and i follow alot of people. And alot of the posts have cuss words. Now if i reblog them i cut what other people cuss out!  Now other people who are beginning to join my tumblr i am warning them of ur tumblr. I show them the posts u post and how u fail to edit them.  And then i show them the email i sent u asking u to refrain from cussing and how u said its a reblog and how i said u can still edit it and how u ignored it. Now i have no.clue what ur situation at home os or what ur life is like im not.judging u. I care for u i really do and as someone who has a hard time from using curse words such as myself its hard for me to see u do this and i truly hope u change it please:( im not perfect and far from but.all i want to do is right amd help others do it. Call me out if im wrong. Anyway idk what to really talk abt now im tired feeling horrible. And want money ugh oh! Yeah so i spent 15 bucks on mew strings they are black strings i really didnt care what color they are i just saw they were the biggest gauge so i got em the 6th string is .50 so yeha big. Why did i get em cause i play in a drop c and lower (drop b and a) tunings. So another thing let me tell u people something im a good person regardless of my actions and yes i listen to metal and screamo it is music! I check the lyrics the band and everything it is NOT!!!!! devil music! OK!!! now screaming is a unique way of usei.g vocal chords not tryin to sound lile satan.  Btw and fyi satan is a fallen angel (<- poisen (80's band) reference ). I grew up (still growing) listeningto to everything i still do. My brother listens to rap and pop. Mom listens to 80's-90's music mainly dad likes country and erika....wellll im gonna do my very best to educate her in all ways of music causr if she is anything like.me and mum it will mean everything.  I would rather her look emo than be a slut! She has attitude but shes beastly. And she digs screamo. Oh and there is a european or some country that has a way of singing called throat singing or something and o think its weird but look it up it is the same chords used as screaming except less harsh. Oh! Another thing hehe. Idk what it is but i do not see the point in takeing pics of urself at concerts. I mean u do know the people u paid to see is on stage???? Im not dissing u but i mean Idk take a pic with the famous person i have with friends.  And of they dont come out then they are either very busy or not worth seeing amd to stuck up to appreciate who pays them!!!! (Miss may i) oh and for those who diss moshing quit! U enjoy the concert ur lame way and i enjoy it my way.  Me and three other random people had to explain what moshing is to someone today. I put it like this. "Moshing was invented from punk. Its a way to take out anger amd build trust. How?  U can push people as hard as u can and when u or someone falls someone is right there to pick u up a complete stranger! Moshing is a perfect example of how there can be structure in chaos!" We arent dumb teenagers ...megan eberly;) matter a fact the last concert i went to i was abt the only teen to get in the pit. Am i crazy?  Yes ive been tested. But i can handle myself Hahaha oh rockstar drinks are abomination to energy! Monster all the way!

dad got me monster again so to celebrate tomorrow i will drink nothing but monster hahahahaha

sooooo i have 4009 pageveiws whoo hoo i suppose dont really care as long as people who read this enjoy it :) so today mom bought me 40 foot of 18 guage wire!!!!! i got to connect the speaker of my broken amp to my speaker oin my working amoo which meeeannnnsss i get to put out twice as much volumes!!!! WHOOO speaking of volumes they are an amazingly talented band

besides the fact im 2 pageveiws away from 4000 veiws im pretty exicted but heres some vids

ok so like have you guys seen my new guitar????? welll iii loovveee ittt!!!!!! it plays so well!!!!!!! and i need to tighten the tuning pegs and maybe some bigger gauged strings...why?? so i can play heavier you see i play in drop C# to drop A tuning and i cant get my guitar will get to drop B right now but its still alittle fuzzy and so i need bigger strings! my friend is going to let me borrow hios huge peavey amp  so you know what that means!!!!! thats riiigghhhtttttt i get to bug my neighbors allllll DAY!!!!!! yes two of my neighbors are elders so what?????? im not screaming just playing lol. also i have two amps right now one is like 12 watt one is 10 the 10 works the 12 doesnt but the speaker does so im going to be doing some rigging with my wires and solder so the pegs on the 12 dont work but the pegs on the 10 watt control both itself and the 12. not that hard but just figureing it out will be tricky but like always i will get it done i wish it didnt rain tommorrow and do....if it doesnt i get to work and make money if it rains i get to go to my paws garage and play and fix up my amps. im gonna post a video of the two songs i can play all the way thru

id just like to say on behalf of myself i have changed no longer leading a double life and am abt to be able to call myself one of jehovah witnesses. no cussing. no drugs. no worldly girls (besides band members that enough is iffy) no fighting.  and i am now seeking psychiatiric help for my self harming (cutting)  habits. and tho most of you scoff its hard for me with all i have to do and have dealt with and yes i may slip up on occasion but did you know the bible says we are all born with a seed of sin????we are all born to sin but i choose to resist sin.

so i bought this devlin inferno guitar for 40 bucks!!!! its worth new 299 and used 144 i got it from some idiot teenager

Parkway drives new cd!!!!

Omgomgomgomgomgomgomgomgomg OMG!!!!! PARKWAY DRIVE IS COMING OUT WITH A NEW ALBUM *FANGIRLS* yes it is true 

      Parkway drive will be releasing their new album "Atlas"  in the US on Oct. 30!

I think every time they release an album they get better like u can hear the difference in change everytime a new album is released and the way the breakdowns are and how their rifts are. if you ask me they have gone a little bit darker in the sneak peak of the album by releaseing dark days the video 

3860 pageveiws yes i have proof

minescraft tnt scientify experimenty

note: I used normal cobblestone for this experiment and not any other form of it Ex.stone, stone block, stone slab

     So i brought it upon myself to find the explosion radius and area of a a single tnt block in minecraft...after 2 hours of studying and gameplay (never thought id say that in one sentence) I have concluded that if! a single TNT block is placed surrounded by complete cobblestone it will destroy 1 block in three directions (creating a cube of destruction) horizontal (back, forth, left, and right), vertical (up, down), diagonal (only way i can explain it is...top left right, top right left, bottom left right, bottom right left). anyway if you do not understand well your stupid.......I would also like to say that i started useing sand and not my correct form of doing it V you see below in pics V and i ended up haveing to use a formula that i remembered to find the side of a triangle. which is a(2)+b(2)=x (the root of x)=c
a and b equal two sides known and c equals the other side x well is just a variable used in the equation

as you can see i made a huge block 12high by 11 wide and 7 wide of cobblestone

i put my tnt in the middle of one face 12 by 11 side

ignited the tnt

it destroyed 1 back 1 to the side and one up and just to make sure I >>>

filled the hole once more back to what it was put the tnt back in its orginal place thennn!!!!

i created a..well its hard to say but anyway i made basically a 3by3by3 cube outside of the tnt and ignited it

and well my results were conclusive 

p.s. I am sure this has already been proven but....im hardheaded and bored and felt like doing something to activate my smart parts (made up) in my brain. so shush.

ok just let me say heres a few things that will get a guy who really cares for a girl to want to end the relationship:

cheating
lies
wants you for your money
She talks to too many guys and not to you
talks to her friends more than you
she has an attitude problem
you dont see her enough
wants you to be more popular
her friends hate you
she says i love you and never want to end but yet!!!!! she says she cant promise it to last forever
is ashamed to be seen with you
isnt romantic


some of these things are fairly simple and some well are complex i am positive there are plenty more. but idk i felt like ranting abt it. anywho tomorrow is suicide awareness day so write love on your wrist or wear yellow or wear both!!!!!

I started skating again!!!!! still got two boards!!!!

this is my cuz sasha with my glasses...we have the same smile

this is my buddy jordan with my glasses goof ball

this is erin (band geek) with my beanie

and thiissss is the two vocalists for a new band!!!!

apparently someone googled my name and then tlc into google to look for my blog. i dont know who you are and i really dont care to be honest but well ive probably met you and this is crazy but screw off maybe? yes. yes i just did that. i dont want people in my life so stay out! select few thats all. sooo besides the fact life sucks....now when i usually say this some roll there eyes and say im a drama a queen but ya know i guess my dad being sent off to a mental hospital and wanting to divorce my mom and my lil brother creating a suicide note and being caught in the act and stopped and then my knee surgery soon isnt really life sucking.. right? SCREW OFF!!!!! all of you some of you have been there for me and said u would like the eberlys and i respect that others now u say it but u yet hold a grudge. eh i really dont even care abt going into it all i know is i dont like you i dont want you and thats basically it oh! i was profiled or diagnosed or whatever for being antisocial...haha u may say TUCKER? NO WAY!!!! well things happen to people that change them. but "how you survie is what makes you who you are" not that bull crap "what doesnt kill you makes you stronger" its b.s. i say B>S>!!!! anywho ive been on a lyric frenzy lately i would sooo upload them but then again i hate all of you haha! so lets see hmmmmmmmm. OH! going to go see kings of prussia!!!! at the peel they are a heavy metal/ electronica instrumental band no words at all. um im going to also go see ten years! AND OMG OMG OMG THE RED JUMPSUIT APPARATUS!!!! EEPPPPP i  love rja!!!!!!!!!!!  too bad ill be on crutches then!!!! ANd ima go see august burns red (one of the first bands i ever heard that got me into metal/screamo) and OF MICE AND MEN!!!!!!! EPP!!!! god i love bands i can sing perfect!!! so i apparently have a high pitched singing voice like i can sing one direction sleeping with sirens pierce the veil and of mice and men and the red jumpsuit apparatus spot ON!!!!! i ju st like singing in general....now my scream tho is well ummm can reach all lengths at this moment but i can only do one for so long like if i do mid or high or low pitch i can go a few hours of singing but if i mix them i can go abt one. anyway im also gonna go see pierce the veil and sleeping with sirens on their tour with my buddy seth from the coast and we are gonna go ..well he is gonna ggo...ok well we r gonna be full on scene (emo posers). but i dress like that now so he only does when its near the cold season cause well...he lives at the beach.

Sean kingston concert!!!!! And just two scenies (emo posers)

If u have nothing. U can grow and only go up. Even u may live in depression and denial and hate. But u camt lose except everyday u lose the chance to increase ur life. But id rather be nothing and have nothing than lose everyday

Look when i die no one will remember me. No one will care after a while we all go down in the books but in everyday life we are all filth just some are veiwed better like u everyone loves u. When i go . U will forget me

I try everyday so i wont burn.. ive tried believeing if i did good. good would happen .....where is it!!?!?!?!  I deserve some happiness but all life says is i should be buried
Buried six feet down. Maggots eat my carrion in sweet bliss. I can feel the dogs piss seeping.  thru the ground. Im in your yard. The ground so cold so hard....(slow acoustic/or soft guitar) friends are for the buried..(stops) so until i die. RUN OFF!!! (<-breakdown) In the darkness of light. we can see our own horizon. Every man has his breaking point. death comes free of charge. To those with two sided friends. Pennys to the eyes. I see the way. Of satans lies.

Whats wrong with me? Why is it so hard for people to like me?  My dad woke me up at 4 in the morning to yell at me for random things and the. Eventually told me he doesnt know how i keep from killing myself. Im always being called a freak or gay and no matter what i do to make people like me they dont i mean what am i doing????

It has come to my attention i will be singing at my best friends wedding...yeah you might ask yourself "why the bloody ell would anyone wnat tucker to sing?" well let me just let yoouuuu know SCREW OFF!!!!! I'm going to be singing scene, If im james dead then your audrey hepburn. this issss the acoustic version by sleeping with sirens.

A STORE OF PURPLE!!!!!

http://www.purpleologist.com/  my lady found this and next time i visit we shall attned this amazing store of purple!!!!! i love how we both love the color of awesome

JOKER VERSUS BANE!!!!!

We all know that I am in love with bane and if iw as annnyyyy super anything thats who I would be.....sooo my friend justin is the same way but with..welll bane!!!! me and him are both defined and like to fight and yes we are both witnesses...so soon after my surgery we shall dress up and fight. 

^this is justin^

R.A.D!!!!

ok so im posting these videos to show you guys what two songs me and my new band shall be covering. do not hate on the metal song!!!

Raising A Dirge (otherwise known as R.A.D)

Where the name came from: Well I was doing bible reading and i came across Jeremiah 9:18 "let them quickly raise a dirge over us, so that our eyes may run down with tears, and our eyelids flow with water."

What the band name means: Well as soon as i read the scripture i looked up what dirge meant and it means "a funeral song" so i thought immediatly it would be R.A.D so either way call us rad or raising a dirge

What music we shall be playing: we shall be playing mostly metal and acoustic! we have one song already down on guitar and drums and we just need an electronic dj to help us we want to start the song off with some light acoustic guitar then it all goes dark no sound and all you hear is the new banes voice from rise of the dark knight saying "I will break you" and then you hear the drop (dubstep) and hear a bloody curdeling scream as we go into some heavy rifts.

Band members and what they do:



Seth Mcloud

Age: 17

Position: Bassist/ Back up clean vocals

Seth is a great friend of mine and is a witness and co starter of the band.He is alot like me we dress scene/emo but we r also big surfer guys or a little preppy

 Justin Vanderburg

Position: Drummer

Age: 21

Justin is a good buddy of mine tho i call him bane and he calls me batman why? well when we first met we did the voices perfect i do batman and he does bane and he looks the size of bane (tom hardy) and ive got the body of christian bales batman so at sometime we are going to dress up and go at it and video the fight..he is also a witness

Alyssa Chevalier

Age: 17

Position: short term guitarist and gorupie (my groupie)

Alyssa is a somewhat good guitar player i beleive i can get her to play certain things i cannot. And yes we are together not officially dateing yet but we are together. the picture at the very top of this blog is a picture of me and her at food lion you cant see it but we wrote hearts and our names in the frost of the ice cream doors there. shes also a witness like everyone in the band

Tucker Moore

Position: Lead clean and screming vocals and rythm/lead guitarist

Age: 16

Hello this is me the co founder of raisng a dirge and yes we are R.A.D ;) it may look like im doing everything in the band as the lead vocalist and scream artist and guitarist but you see my girl is still a beginner and metal is hard to play so she will be playing what i cant while im screaming and singing. but once we find a good enough guitarist we shall add him and possible keep alyssa and then i wont have to play guitar or she may leave the band and i wont have to play alllll the rifts which will be awesome!!!!

3006 veiws...meh not to interested right now im kinda proud but i dont care lol
more videos to  post sooonnnn!!!!!

PUNKKK!!!!

so im sorry but i am a metal head now but im still a huggeeee punk on the inside so i just want people to stay true to ur roots and stay true to  yourself!!! So im going to post some great punk bands and songs

First the fathers and gods of punk!!!

THE ramones!!!!!! i love these guys

 The Clash!!!  

SEX PISTOLS!!!!! i love SID VICIOUS!!!

NOW!!! FOR my other favs!!!

Going to hot topic over the past year ive built up 26357 points so if i get 300 today ill get $15 off WHOOOHOO!!!!!heres some stuff im planning on getting 

these jean shorts i loovvveeee but i dont like how they are above the knee :( i may take my old skinny jeans and make a pair

For some reason i have recently had this amazement with tank tops